I'M TAKING CHARGE!

Maria Francia Posted At 5:47:00 PM

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Out of Touch

I'm not sure if I ever used this title before but I feel that this is apt for this article. Most of the time I'm just home chilling, watching TV, and surfing the net, since I'm not currently employed I have a lot of time to think about things, my life and how it changed since I last remebered it. Growing up is very difficult because you are torn between two things that are equally important to you but then you have to choose. One is reality and the other is ideal. In your mind you have a perfect picture of who you want to be. You have a clear idea of where you're working, what your doing on a daily basis and people you hang out with but like a cold splash of water you'll realize that, that's next to impossible so you have no choice but to choose reality, contradicting my earlier statement I think between reality and ideal you really have no choice because you'll be forced to go with reality since you are pressured by everyone to go with it, sometimes fighting for the ideal is moot and academic, fighting for it will just leave you disappointed and frustrated.

That's where I am right now. Giving up on the ideal and starting to accept that I need to wake up and smell the coffee, as the proverbial saying goes. When you start accepting reality, the whole idea of yourself become skewed and unclear and just like that you'll realize that you don't know who you really are. Your previous definition of yourself is attached to the ideal not with reality. You'll have to start over and begin to look deeper and try to merge your idea of yourself with reality. The important thing to remember is that even if the definition changes, your values must not because whatever paradigm you're in, the values that are dear to you will somehoew predict how you are going to act in a certain situation, the paradigm which it revolves, it meaning your life, will be the one changing. Think of it as a car, the motor or whatever it is that makes the car move stays the same its just that if you think you're a Ferrari before but you'll realize that you're a Ford pala. That's how I see my life right now. I'm starting to let go some things and start accepting that relinquishing your ideal self need not be painful you'll just have to accept that there are better things for you not neccessarily ones that you imagined but more or less better.

It's difficult to grow up. You have choices, responsibilities, rights, ideas and feelings all of which makes life more beautiful but just the same they are the source of your misery when they start to contradict with each other. You have to choose responsibly within the framework of your rights and ideas and put all your feelings to that decision live with it and face its consequences.

Maria Francia Posted At 9:06:00 PM

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